“Fifteen hundred years ago, everyone know that Earth was the center of the universe. Five hundred years ago, everyone knew that the Earth was flat, and fifteen minutes ago, you knew that humans were alone on this planet. Imagine what you’ll know tomorrow.” – Agent Kay (Men in Black)

It’s been a hot minute since my last post. I’m extremely aware and very apologetic! I haven’t been as productive as I would have liked to have been this summer, and now that the August weeks are whining down I’ve been feeling a large mix of emotions; one of which is disappointment. I’ve been disappointed with myself and I often find that it’s hard for me to jump back up from that kind of self-low. Add on top of that some uncertainty about specific friendships, relationships, employment, academic classes, and a recent location move? Motivation has been hard to come by.

I’d first like to make give an update on Nan. If you caught my previous post where I talked a little about NDEs, you’ll remember my story about visiting my sick great-grandmother. However, the only news I have to report is that there has been radio silence about her condition. My evil grandmother has yet to contact anybody, save maybe the aunt and uncle I had mentioned in that last post, with a follow up. It’s all been a huge question mark and for some reason my dad hasn’t been following through on his own. In fact, he got a bit pissed when I came home to visit and asked him how she was doing. I confronted my mom and she believes that he is hurt by the lack of communication. His family isn’t reaching out to him during this difficult time and he feels neglected and/or forgotten. Unfortunately, my grandmother is the type of person who would keep even her passing a secret, so we’re left with no option but to attempt to investigate on our own. Again, I’ll keep the blog informed.
I will confide with you all though that I believe something negative has occurred; most likely within the past two-and-a-half weeks.

Like most people who feel connected to the spiritual world, I have found meaning/understanding in symbols. From what I have concluded and accepted, messages aren’t given to us cut and dry. We aren’t going to close our eyes, pray for guidance, and immediately receive word from a voice in our head that happens to speak our native language. That sort of faith gives us, as humans, the wrong idea by letting ourselves think that we individuals have that much priority within the larger picture. Newsflash to some people who appear on my Facebook timeline: we aren’t that important.
The good news? We’re still being heard! And if we’re genuine in our quest for guidance and answers, we’ll receive information in a thoughtful and appropriate manner. It may not be clear at first what the message is (or that a message is being transmitted at all), but our Guides (angel, spirit, guardians, those who have crossed over) love us. They love us and they are wiser. I don’t know about you, but I wouldn’t want to question the knowledge and experience of an entity that has access to multiple realms.
One of my more common symbols is that of the moth.
If you’re thinking, “wait a minute, Nicole. I have heard that the moth itself takes the form of the messenger, how can it also symbolize the message?”, I’m not arguing with you. It is known that coming into contact with a lone moth relatively soon after praying to a deceased loved one is that spirit’s way of presenting itself. The moth is a recognizable form that happens to take a particular interest in the pray maker. Perhaps as if saying “don’t worry child, I am with you; you are not alone in this.”
My personal belief is that this holds true for the White Moth. Come into contact with a lone white moth and know that a parted love one is nearby and that they are aware of your inner-most thoughts and struggles. Other moths of varying colors must be read to your personal situation. For me, coming into contact with any moth is a sign that you are vibing strongly with the spiritual world. Remember though that I am not talking about the group of moths who are solely interested in an outdoors lantern. Is said moth acting peculiar? Feel it out. Do not interfere, observe every movement, and reflect on life and previous prayers. If you think this type of observation seems silly, then you may be in the wrong field of interest. The spirit world has a different perspective of beauty then we do; there are separate tiers of importance. Any living thing in our realm is considered beautiful and is automatically less tainted than human beings. These specimens have a natural connection to spirit that runs deeper than we can fathom. Take any living thing as a possibility of being a sign.
I reiterate: be genuine in your quest for information. Open-mindedness and humility will get you closer to your goal of knowledge, this I can practically guarantee.
My understanding and appreciation for moth symbolism came to me last year while I was studying abroad in Nova Scotia. I was doing an immersion program to better learn the French language. Many hours of the program were scheduled, and we got our daily briefings early each weekday morning. Every person in your French level, as well as the teachers and staff, were present for these briefings. Lots of fun, but as a beginner I was feeling the struggle of complete foreign language immersion. I prayed a lot; somewhat because it was one of the few things I could get away doing in English. Well a few weeks into the program I got quite a surprise at one of these briefings. My class was sitting in the back row, closest to the side of the room where there was a door that led to the outside. Most of the time the door was left open for sunlight and a breeze and that day happened to be no exception. The presenter was almost finished speaking when a large colorful moth flew into the room and landed on the desk I was leaning on. I jumped back in my chair out of surprise for multiple reasons, mostly, 1) I wasn’t prepared for anything flying in my face while in a classroom and 2) what moth is seen to be hanging out in the bright sunlight? It stuck around for a minute, seemingly not perturbed by the noise and activity going on around it, before it flew right back out where it came from.
The rest of the day carried on like usual, until the night came around.
There were lots of themed parties that took place during this program and the main location was in a building a short walking distance from all residential halls. I had journeyed to the party with a group of friends that I had made and we ended up waiting outside for a bit because of a couple of the people wanted to take pictures while they were in costume. I wasn’t exactly thrilled with the people I was with and was just kind of standing off to the side, talking to one friend I actually liked, when I received another surprised. A large white moth came out of no where and landed directly on my shirt. Again I was startled! Unfortunately, I did the typical shimmy and screech thing one does when something unexpected lands on you. Though I must say that moth held on like a champion. It didn’t want to let go of my shirt until I shimmied a bit too hard and it lost it’s grip. It flew into the night after that, but it made a large enough of an impact that after I was over partying (not much later if I’m going to be real) I got ready for bed and researched moth symbolism.
Since then, I’ve reflected upon each of my moth encounters and concluded, though specific for each occasion, that the moth is a sign of life, well-being, and reassurance.
So imagine my surprise when, about that two-and-a-half weeks ago, I exited my bedroom one night to visit the restroom and, and outside my door, discovered a beautiful, large, and colorful moth lifeless on the ground
I can’t even describe to you how eerie such a discovery was; how shocked and cold I felt at the instant realization that this was not right.
Imagine how empty those dorm hallways were, because it was intercession and only few students (including myself) hadn’t moved out yet.
Imagine how windowless that fourth floor is, as all doors (stairwells, bathrooms, bedrooms and lounges) swing tightly shut as a fire safety measure.
Imagine how restless the custodian staff was being with such few residents in the building; cleaning everything meticulously, numerous times, as they were starting to get bored.
How out of place it was for this vibrant creature to find its final resting spot, and how no one else had taken action to move its remains for hours afterward.
I’m afraid that this is the inconclusive note I’m going to have to end this blog on. As of this moment of publication, I regrettably have no more information on this matter; be it through family or elsewhere. One of the few things to count on with people, is that they all talk eventually and gossip goes far. I just can’t promise what that word of the mouth will sound like.
Until then…
~Stay Spooky~
Nicole Felicity

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